Wednesday, January 18, 2006

New phrase

Last night's Law & Order: SVU. The boyfriend and I are semi-delirious, because we had just finished two hours of American Idol, slightly time-shifted on TiVo because commercials are for losers, right? Which means we're starting our Meloni & Mariska at 10:30 or whatever. Crazy.

The show opens a Manhattanite chasing her cute little dog, which is always trouble. A friendly couple stop the dog, leading to this lovely dialogue:

Man: Got him! Hey, what have you got in your mouth?
Camera pan to the dog chewing on something red.
Woman: That looks like afterbirth. Did your dog just have puppies?
Owner: No.
Woman: I've had three kids. That's human.
Concerned looks cut to faster walking cut to shot of garbage bags with the sound of a newborn crying. Chung chung!

Seriously, the scene had to be rapidly paced, and it had to get a lot of info across to the viewer in a short amount of time, which meant going from runaway dog to discovered baby in about six seconds, but who in the right mind would ever be able to recognize afterbirth?

Try saying "That looks like afterbirth" in a concerned tone right now. It's ridiculous. It could only be used ironically -- Nina Garcia critizing Santino's latest over-the-top extravaganza, not "OMG, there's an abandoned infant in the dumpster."

So thank you, poor unappreciated two-line L&O:SVU actor. Your line reading totally made my day, and added a new phrase to my personal lexicon.


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